Passionate Pesto: Great for dinner parties and orgies, alike!!

If you’re going to “Go Roman,” why not indulge in Italian, Ci?

This pesto recipe is potent yet simple; the only thing that distinguishes it is the quality of its ingredients. For example, I never prepare this dish without fresh basil from my own herb garden. It has never failed me. You will continue to be wildly successful.

Necessities in approximate measures:

1. Salt, ~¼ tsp.
2. Fresh Basil, ~1 cup of loosely packed leaves.
3. Garlic, 1 peeled clove to press.
4. Pine Nuts. You may substitute peeled almonds, but toasting will be a little different.
5. A finger of Parmesan cheese. Of course it will be processed, but a freshly grated block has more umph – the way you like it.
6. Extra Virgin Olive Oil. I’ve found Kirkland’s EVOO to be superior to some really pricey imports.
7. Medium-sized rock shrimp is highly recommended, but you can use just about any shellfish or poultry in pesto. Make sure they are peeled and de-veined as shrimp shit is not sexy.
8. Cherry tomatoes, sliced.
9. Goat Cheese. You may substitute Feta for the less adventurous.
10. Pasta. Linguini is preferable. It’s slurpable, messy and fun!

First, start readying the pasta like your mamma taught you. Along with minimal salt, I add a few dashes of EVOO to the water so the linguini doesn’t stick.

Now, the most challenging part is toasting the pine nuts. I’ve found that it works best with a toaster oven. I admit it took a lot of trial and error until realizing that one must sacrifice a few that are especially quick to blacken. Be sure to explain this so no one loses confidence when they smell burning pine nuts. Spread about two heaping tablespoons on the toaster tray. Have the glove ready – you don’t want to go searching for it when you need it! Toast and watch constantly. Allow a few to blacken while most turn golden, then immediately transfer to a dish so they stop cooking. Toss out the burnt ones, and place the rest in the food processor.

Grate about a tablespoon of Parmesan and press one clove of garlic into the processor. Feel free to use more but it will void my guarantee.

Pour in enough EVOO to cover everything and hit the processor a few times.

Add the basil and process until you have a nice and thin slurry.

By this time you should have placed your pasta in the boiling water and it’s nearly ready. It’s important to aim for a randy al dente consistency to subliminally state your purpose.

Shrimp will cook super fast over medium high heat in melted butter with salt & fresh ground pepper to taste and a generous squeeze of lemon juice.

Toss the cooked shrimp and linguini with the pesto.

Serve with sliced cherry tomatoes arranged on top. Offer freshly grated Parmesan just like Olive Garden, which your date is certainly very thankful not to be going to. I then allow the goat or feta cheese to my guest(s) discretion.

Accompaniments:

My wine suggestion would be an Arneis variety, which is a little known Italian white known to be light and easy to drink. It goes very well with summer fare.

A quality baguette with EVOO, balsamic vinegar, and freshly grated Parmesan and ground pepper for dipping is a must.

Venus and Organist and a Little Dog - Tiziano Vecellio

Finally, if he/she’s a keeper, deploy Mozart and Da Ponte’s collaborative effort, The Marriage of Figero, otherwise, may as well turn on Bolero – it’s like lubricant!